Drawbacks of Early Marriage

As soon as the month Magh begins, the season of Marriage starts. The season does not end with Marriage, but with various plans about marriage. No matter, if a young daughter is at the someone’s marriage, or at the home itself, she will be eyed by large number of relatives.

 It is understandable that marriage is not an end of life and basically for females, it is the new beginning. Living a life single is probably is difficult and maybe that is why there is the system of getting married. Marriage definitely brings two opposite genders together socially, culturally, physically, geographically and emotionally. But does this mean that one needs to get married so early?

 I would certainly not think of this topic if I have had not heard the female friends of my batch are getting married or got married. It has been for last five years, I have been hearing this.  She just completed her plus two, was okay at her studies and now she got married! I can understand that it is not an end of her life, but she could at least have made a firm stand to her life through good career. Only because a proposal from good family came parents excitedly accept it with the fear that upcoming proposal might not be as good as this one. But they lack the concept that even few years of further education, their daughter can make them self determined. I have no personal experience regarding the effectiveness of such early marriage but what if it ends in divorce? Where will these young ladies go? They neither posses good education and could not definitely stand on her leg!

 Let us suppose that the general life expectancy of Nepal is sixty. Now does not any female have the right to spend at least fifty percent with freedom? The mark made by Government for any female to get
 married never means that the daughter must get married at the specific age itself. I don’t call marriage at such age an early marriage, but rather prefer calling it insensitive marriage. We are definitely not influenced by Western Styles where Katy Perry married at a little more than that age and Miley Cirus chooses her bride at the same age. It is the truth that the narrow minded parents are afraid to spend for their daughter's education as well as marriage.

 So the parents try to remove the burden as soon as possible not simply in the cases of villages, but even in big cities and towns. What can daughter do when their parents bring an offer of well qualified guy with good background and request her to marry? Ability to cook, clean house that her mother taught are not the signs that she is fit for her marriage. Life is uncertain, so family must stay aware regarding their daughters even if their husband leaves or has to face death.

 It is only the good qualification that can let her be self determined. No matter whatever the husband does, dissatisfaction within wife can challenge her husband and hence the feeling of respect from both visions stays mutual. It is not necessary for the job after marriage if there is a mutual understanding, but no where it has yet been mentioned that educated wives cannot be good house wives.

This can be understood, that family will be at the stage of quick decision when the proposal from a good place comes. Hence, they accept it considering it the right and best opportunity ever. The girl will have no option, when her family desires for the thing.  But, the family ignores that once their daughter becomes competent, thousands such proposals can come to the door step. Again, there are cases, when the family does not aim in spending any further for the daughter, regarding that she has to be sent some way or the other. But, sending her out quick, will makes them less responsible towards the family. Once, she gets the chance to enroll with every happiness and sadness of her family, she will feel herself the part of her parent’s family, else she will be gradually start losing that feeling. There are plenty cases where daughter looks after the family, and son is completely away.

Don’t get me wrong! I am not against the marriage. I must appreciate few factors of our marriage, to prove that I am not pessimistic anyway. We don’t have huge discussions over dowry system, and the trend has no longer been sticking as the major issue for the marriage. The marriage has been getting less expensive, people have started spending as their pocket suggests. Except few cases, the parties are not messy, with less alcoholic things.

Only a certain delay with a good education can make daughter's life more healthy, strong and charming. Happy Married Life!